Best Certamen Question and Answer Ever:

Q:What Derivative from the Latin word meaning "to throw" means "a sudden exclamation?"

A:Ejaculation

I was actually looking for interjection, but I'll accept it.

From Sipe's Board

"Clark Est Certamenatrix"


"Plenus + Acc."

"Robbers are just land-pirates."

Sipe : "Steve, you look like a bullfrog"
Steve: "You will eat your words when I fuck your test."

Antonian Certamen: Pedica Aut Ceve

With Regards to Sipe's Old Photo

"Mr. Sipe, you look like a crack ho."
-Steve
"Mr. Sipe has to have been a stoner, there's no way he couldn't of been."
-Timmy
"I bet they photoshopped out the doobie."
-anonymous
"No I wasn't smoking! My mother took that picture and my wife and kid are in the background!"
-Sipe

"Beneath his insufferably arrogant exterior, Mr. Richter just wants to be loved... or perhaps sodomized."

"... and where is Andie?"

...

"Did you just say whoring?"

Antonian Certamen: Let's Gang Bang this Thing and Go Home.

Antonian Certamen: Si Calorem Tolerare Non Potes, Te Neca.

Antonian Certamen: Pedico, Ergo Sum

"Adam's not even human; he's a serpent. He doesn't even have eyelids."

a good Latin student never declines sex.

"We mounted the comeback and rode it all the way to victory."
-Jerry Mendez

Just think about it for a few seconds...

non possum nunc dicere, quoniam ōs meum est plenum boni vini.

Lapsus Linguae

"...what did Tom just commit? No, it isn't sodomy."

Chuck Norris is always in the perfect tense.

"Ok guys, enough jokes about manholes it's getting old."

Cheese, the most masculine of all the dairy products

"Mr. Lewis, I will dance on your grave."

"Oh the splendor of me"

Sipe's favorite riddle

"What do all battered wives have in common?"

?

"They just Don't KNOW HOW TO SHUT UP"

At Certamen practice

Sipe: What is an English derivative from the Latin word for slow which means "Jerry Mendez?"

Retarded?

Sipe: Correct

From Sipe's board:

Sipe est minimus sub toga.*

*Yes, this is also in the original Sipeisms, and in a similar format, but it was actually written on the board two separate times.

A Sipe Classic

"If you said that a gladiator killed someone with his sword that would be ablative of means, but if you said that you spent the night with your cousin that would be the ablative of accompaniment."

(snickering)


"Ah, yes, I suppose that would be the ablative of incest, wouldn't it?"

Anno, annere, anus sum- to be a complete a-hole

To the parents:

"This class is really going great; nobody's died in years."

Taco, Tacere, Teci, Tactum- to taco

"You've had a lot of stuff crammed into you, so it's understandable if: one, you're a bit confused, or two if you're sore."

"This is one of those dysfunctional family quizzes; I beat you because I love you."

"The sophomores this year aren't like you guys, they just take it with their face in the pillow and their knees bent."

"Mr. Guerra, do you feel comfortable with the basics of Latin? Oh, that's right, Mr. Guerra got first place on grammar at state, so he feels confident. By the way, let's talk about cheating and plagiarism..."

Sipe: You guys, this would be breaking my heart if I had one
Adam: No heart? Then where are we supposed to put the stake?
Sipe: Exactly! I'm immortal!

About this blog

This blog, though it is empty as I type this, will hopefully be filled someday with the wise words of our beloved Latin teacher, Mr. Sipe. I must give due credit to Thanh, who was the original creator of the Sipeisms blog, though the previous blog was located elsewhere.